Charlie and the Indian Sex Blogger

It’s a sad time. We know society’s in trouble when cartoonists are gunned down for drawing stuff. The only way to react is, to tell these fundamentalists, that nothing is going to curtail the right to the freedom of speech. In memory of Charlie Hebdo’s vision, we present an interview with the only Pakistani sex blogger in the world – Eiynah.

Based in Canada, she has already heckled many people in the Muslim world for her outright views. She shot to fame when she wrote an open letter to Ben Affleck who was defending Islam. Apart from that, she has authored a children’s book called My Chacha is Gay. She is also running a campaign called ‘We Bear our Breasts’. She talks about women’s rights, receiving death threats, the liberals’ refusal to talk about Islam and the Aamir Khan-starrer PK. Excerpts from the interview:

Q: What inspired you to name your blog Nice Mangos?

I chose Nice Mangos because of the popularity of Pakistani mangos, and for the usage of mangos as a euphemism for breasts. I thought it was apt because I write about sex. It’s also meant to be a subtle statement about the objectification of women

Q: What’s your reader profile like? How many readers do you get per month?

I get readers from all over the world, it’s amazing. I am super grateful, that so many people want to hear what I have to say. My largest audiences are from the US, Pakistan and India. But I get readers from Russia, Australia, Germany, Malaysia…all over the place! The number count varies of course. In a good month, I’ve had over 80 thousand. (Read: Paris Shooting: Charlie Hebdo were not anti-Islamic, they just liked to piss everyone off!)

Q: What kind of threats have you received? Why in your opinion are hardliners so threatened by your thoughts?

I receive all kinds of unacceptable threats. Death threats, rape threats, threats of violence. I hear from people who say I’m a coward because I will not share my address with them, so they can ‘come get me’.

It doesn’t actually take much for a fundamentalist to be threatened by one’s thoughts. They probably don’t like that I am open about being an ex-Muslim, an atheist. The fact that I am an outspoken woman or that I promote a healthy sex-positive attitude. That I speak out for women’s rights in our culture, most recently it seems to be my children’s book My Chacha is Gay which has upset fundamentalists from all faiths. Homosexuality is not acceptable in most mainstream, organized religions. I urge people to move past that. To look at things with human rights and equality in mind.

Q: Do you ever worry about your personal safety?

Of course. Yeah. Sometimes it all gets a bit much. And I have to take a step back. But I return because I hear from so many people who want me to share their stories. I don’t want to turn them away. Luckily I live in a safe, secular country. If I lived in Pakistan, I probably couldn’t have written and drawn half the things I have. But it is out of fear for my personal safety that I choose to remain anonymous. I wish this wasn’t the case, because I take pride in my work. To not be able to attach my name to it is frustrating. But sadly, that is the world we live in.

Q: Why is it so hard in your opinion for liberals (even in the Western World) to criticise Islam?

Honestly, I don’t know. I feel like cultural relativism plays a large part in that. For the far left, being politically correct and inclusive of ‘diversity’ has gotten to a point where they cannot even point out clear human rights violations – like the burqa, because they assume it is part of our culture. I don’t think it’s fair to assume that such misogyny is ‘part of a culture’. It should be called out, and Muslims should be held to the same moral standards as everyone else. It can actually be quite offensive to see that many liberals from other cultures think we’re not capable of being as moral and tolerant as others. If we are not held accountable, how will our communities evolve? (Read: Charlie Hebdo and the Paris Shooting: The terrorists did have a religion – it’s called Islam)

Q: Did you by any chance watch PK? Would a movie like that raise people’s hackles in Pakistan? 

I did! I had heard so much about it, I had to watch it. And I absolutely loved it. It is brilliant beyond words. Such a gentle message, vague enough for people to take it at different levels, whatever level they are comfortable with and yet a definite nudge in the right direction. It was very entertaining, and really something that should go down in history. Which I think it is, being one of the highest grossing Bollywood movies, if I am not mistaken. That in itself is indicative of the fact that people are ready for a shift in attitude. It also speaks volumes that Aamir Khan, being Muslim-born felt comfortable enough in India to star in this film. I don’t think this would be the case with a non-Muslim star in a Muslim country.

This movie will be very helpful for opening Pakistani minds as well. I am glad they touched on all the major religions of our region. They had to focus on one that spoke to the majority of their audience… they did an excellent job. I can’t say that enough. The entire team must have been amazing, to be this progressive and forward-thinking.

It opens doors for this kind of thought in Pakistan – though I don’t think the country is ready for such productions to be made locally, but at least the seed has been planted. The extremists are not a small minority and it could be very dangerous if such a film was made in Pakistan. But the fact that PK is far enough removed from Pakistan makes it easier for people there to digest.

Q: Why is Islam as a religion so inflexible? Most other religions are flexible, updating itself with time but Islam seems unwilling to move on.

Because it is seen as the pure unalterable word of God. People pride themselves on the fact that Islam has not changed over time. Many view other religions as watered down and adulterated. But to be fair, I know plenty of Muslims who want change, who want reform, who want to move on – they too receive threats, or are silenced. It just so happens that the most dominant interpretation/strain is this rigid, inflexible kind. I think if you look at fundamentalists of any faith, you will find this unforgiving rigidity. We just happen to have a large majority of people with very fundamentalist beliefs. That’s the problem.

Q: What’s it like being an atheist or feminist in Pakistan?

I live in Canada, fortunately. This is a country where freethinking people thrive; religion doesn’t come up much in the public domain. Equality is something we strive for in Canada too, while not perfect – we are doing pretty well.  When I lived in Pakistan, I found it difficult to adjust – more difficult than growing up in Saudi Arabia actually. I don’t think I could live there with the conservative expectations most people have. Being an atheist in Pakistan has to be a very silent thing. You certainly cannot declare it publicly, because there could be grave consequences. Being a feminist in Pakistan is quite depressing, every step of the way you are reminded of the inequality between men and women.

Q: I read that you dream of a progressive Pakistan? What would you want in a state like that?

Secularism or the separation of Mosque and State. If only people could keep their beliefs private and not try to impose them on others. The country would be a much better place. I wish our minorities were treated with love and respect. I wish our textbooks did not have religion involved, because religion is so different for every individual. I wish there were rights for LGBT people, more rights for women. But at the moment, these things seem very far away.

Q: And finally can you tell us more about the ‘We Bear Our Breasts’ campaign? 

We Bear our Breasts had an incredible response from women who wanted to participate and share the stories of misogyny in our culture. And I have got a lot of negativity from men. They said I was encouraging ‘immodesty’. It is very clear that many Pakistani men think that women shouldn’t have decision-making control over their own bodies (and that’s what I hoped to highlight). I will be reopening the project soon. And this time it will be not only for Pakistanis but women all over the subcontinent. We share the same burden of being a woman in our patriarchal cultures. We all have stories that need to be told.